THE NOTORIOUS BETTIE PAGE

After a month of obsessive Gray's Anatomy DVD marathon, the idea of watching something non-death-related seemed like such a relief, except the movie was utterly disappointing and I was only left with the urgent yearning for Bettie's fabulous wardrobe. Great idea, interesting facts, bad execution, and terrible script. Gretchen Mol delivered an earnest, delectable performance as the innocently naked heroin.

this movie makes me want to have:

A big ol' banana and wafer pudding from the 50s.

THANK YOU FOR SMOKING

This political satire is witty, entertaining, and a bit too stuffy at times. Nonetheless, I had a good time viewing it. Aaron Eckhart delivered a sleek performance playing the smart ass Satan. J shivered at the sight of Cameron Bright, who played Aaron Eckhart's son. He called him, "the creepy kid".

this movie makes me want to have:

Those thick-cut fries that Maria Bello's character kept munching on whenever she dined with her two male pals.

THE DEPARTED

If the second season of the Sopranos was a toothsomely smoky hunk of beef at the Burger Joint, then The Departed would be the supremely legendary slab of porter house steak at the Peter Luger Steakhouse. Don't even think about asking for the menu, just sit back and let Marty Scorsese take you on a wondrously wild ride. The film is as good as crime cinema gets. It even surpassed the original 2002 Hong Kong blockbuster, Infernal Affairs, with an edge-of-your-seat script and unbeatable sense of direction. Watch Scorsese's choreography and youll realize that its total sacrilege that he hasnt had an Oscar yet.

This movie makes me want to have:

Duck L'orange and that sky-high chocolate concoction Matt Damon's character ordered in one scene.

X-MAN 3 - THE LAST STAND (A.K.A. EVERYONE'S A LITTE BIT MUTANT)

An hour into the DVD viewing, at which point J was so excited that he almost humped his HDTV screen,

GOURMET GAL:
Say, J, can I ask you a question?

J:
Sure!

GOURMET GAL:
So what happened to Jean Grey in the last one?

J:
SAY WHAT?!

GOURMET GAL:
I said, what happened to Jean before? Her hair looks terrible!

J:
@#$%^&*()_+<>?+_)(*&^%$#@! …
(ten minutes of blabbing with lots of arm movements and google-eyed stares)

GOURMET GAL:
Hum, okay I got it. But why does Huge Jackman’s leather jacket have a giant X on it?

J:
……………………………

Awkward silence.
Five, four, thre-

J:
Are you sure you are Asian?!

this movie makes me want to have:

A pot of cozy cheese fondu so I could something to focus on.
Thumbs down for zero food scenes!